143

Tuesday, August 21, 2012, 7:45PM Don't worry, you didn't miss much. If my tulpa has a voice, then it is LOUD and I've heard it before (and didn't think it was special). Here's what I've been doing: I imagine a planet, representing my mind, with the surface crashing with ocean waves. I then visualize the calming of the waves. The ocean waves, in more detail, is me remembering the feeling of being out of control of my thoughts or actions. It is my lack of understanding-- complexity. If I take the time to put aside the complexities, then I get to where clarity is growing stronger. The 'voice' may be a fluke with having to do with transitioning between sleep and wake, but perhaps not. On another note, if I was say, involuntarily admitted to an mental illness treatment facility and they, say, kept me longer than any sane person would deem appropriate in order to, say, collect money from insurance or other funds made possible by having patients, the people following my blog would not take the fact that I stopped posting for an entire week without warning after making a point to post each day for 142 days as a sign that something was wrong and investigate the matter. That's good, because that's what real-life friends (the ones who room with you) are for. My roommates would likely find my absence suspicious, so don't worry about the above hypothetical extraction that not only entertained you, but provided information that my strange sense of humor is still intact, which means whatever did happen while I was gone didn't take everything from me. Progress: No certain responses.

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