36.2

Saturday, April 28, 2012, 11:33PM

I meditated earlier today, but not for long.  There is nothing to say as far as significance goes.  Then again, I should explain anyway.  I don't know what assumptions you've made as to how I meditate, so I will include all I can.  I probably should have posted this a while ago, but better late than never.

I don't think I usually plan anything out, but I might feel more inclined to a certain method that day if I want to try something new.  Like water, I will choose the path of least resistance.
I pick a quiet place and make sure it is dark.  The last few times, I used my own dorm.  While my roommate is asleep or away, I sit cross-legged and slouch into a relaxed position (I find that it is easier than sitting up straight).  When the sun was rising, I put blankets up to block the light.
My hands do not touch, but are separated from one another by my smartphone, which stores figure anatomy references.  My method of learning is not brute force-- it is trying all sorts of methods in order to find the right one that works the best.
I look at the images for a long time, noting the size and distance of the features of, say, a face.  I trace the lines with my eyes and pretend to draw them.  Sometimes I use my fingers.  I try to appreciate the aspects that appeal to me-- aspects which make something beautiful.  I have once or twice tried to 'scan' pictures with my eyes by analyzing it (extremely) slowly and snaking my tiny area of focus from the top right corner to the bottom left.  I try looking at the pictures with my peripheral vision from every angle I can.  I try checking up on the pictures even when I am not in a meditation session.
If I run into trouble, such as thinking a corrupt thought, I will stop.  Usually, this only occurs in the beginning and I can tell how bad it will be by this.  If it does not reveal itself until long into the meditation (past 25 minutes), then I will press onward instead of aborting and losing my hard-earned focus.  I will not abort if I am weak in my awareness of my surroundings.* 

*I have a theory that there is a semi-selfish awareness aspect to our minds that is constantly telling us, "You are alive and your location is your room." or  "You exist and your location is unknown."  It grows weak when you focus on something else.  It can change when getting really into a movie, for example.  The paradox of this is that one cannot say, "Hey!  That part of my brain that usually reminds me of my own existence is asleep right now!"  or else that part of the brain will activate.  If I am correct, then this part of the brain contributes to the short delay/hesitation in what we say and do.  I say this because those in the habit of selflessness tend to instinctively not base their decisions off of data relevant to themselves.

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